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Looking After Yourself as a Carer
Caring for someone can be comforting and rewarding. It can also be tiring, frustrating and isolating.
Your own wellbeing matters. Taking time for yourself, getting support, and asking for help before things reach crisis point can make caring more manageable.
Looking after yourself is not selfish. It helps you keep going, and it can help the person you care for too. This page explains practical ways to look after yourself as a carer, including breaks, assessments, financial support and social connection.
The sections below cover some of the ways caring can affect your own health, wellbeing, work, money and social life. They also explain what support may be available, including breaks from caring, a carer's assessment and local community support.
You do not need to wait until you are exhausted or at crisis point before asking for help. Looking after yourself is part of making caring safer and more sustainable for both you and the person you care for.
Your Wellbeing
Caring can affect your physical health, emotional wellbeing, sleep, work, relationships and social life. You may feel tired, anxious, guilty, frustrated, isolated, low or overwhelmed.
These feelings are common, but they are also signs that you may need support. Many carers carry on for a long time before asking for help. You do not need to wait until you are exhausted.
Even a short break can help. This might mean ten minutes with a cup of tea, time to read, a short walk, or a conversation with someone outside your caring role.
Taking a Break
A break from caring does not have to mean going away. It may simply mean having regular time when you are not responsible for care.
Respite can take different forms. Someone may come into the home to sit with or care for the person you look after. The person you care for may attend an activity group or day centre. There may be help from family, friends, voluntary organisations, paid care services, or short-term residential care.
A break can give you time to rest, shop, attend appointments, work, see friends, take part in activities, or simply have some time to yourself.
Carer's Assessment
A carer's assessment is a conversation with a council professional about your caring role and how it affects your life. It is not a test, and it is not about judging whether you are doing enough. It is a way of looking at what support would help you keep caring safely, while also protecting your own health and wellbeing.
The assessment may look at the practical care you provide, how much time it takes, whether you are getting enough sleep, whether caring is affecting your physical or mental health, and whether you are able and willing to continue. It can also cover work, study, family life, money worries, transport, social isolation and what would happen in an emergency if you could not provide care.
The support offered will depend on your situation, but it might include advice, training, help to arrange breaks from caring, support groups, counselling or emotional support, help with planning for emergencies, or signposting to benefits and local services. In some cases, it may also lead to practical support being arranged for the person you care for.
You do not need to wait until you are at breaking point to ask for a carer's assessment. It is there to help you understand your options and find support that is right for your situation.
Money and Work
Caring can affect your finances, employment and future plans. You may need advice about Carer's Allowance, Carer's Credit, Universal Credit, Attendance Allowance, Personal Independence Payment, Council Tax support, pensions, grants, travel costs, equipment costs, flexible working or time off for emergencies.
If you are working, you may want to speak to your employer about your caring responsibilities. You do not have to share every detail, but explaining the situation may help you access support.
Benefits can affect each other, so it is worth getting advice before applying or changing anything.
Social Prescribing and Community
Social prescribing can help connect people with local, non-clinical support. This might include local groups, social activities, exercise, arts and music, walking groups, choirs, allotments, drop-ins, cafe chats, education, courses, volunteering, faith groups or community activities.
Local libraries, village halls, churches, parish noticeboards, local magazines, local radio and community organisations can also be good places to find activities and support.
Social connection matters. Caring can become isolating, and regular contact with other people can help protect your wellbeing.
When to Ask for More Help
Ask for more help if you are constantly exhausted, not sleeping, missing your own medical appointments, feeling anxious or low, becoming isolated, struggling financially, finding work or study unmanageable, or worried that care is no longer safe.
You do not have to cope alone. Speak to your GP, local carers service, council, social care team, hospice team or another professional involved in care.
If there is immediate risk to someone's safety, call 999.
Useful Resources
You may find it helpful to speak to your GP, local carers service, council, employer, benefits adviser or another professional if caring is affecting your health, work, money or wellbeing.
Useful sources of information include:
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Carers UK: Information, advice and support for unpaid carers.
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Carer's Credit: Information about National Insurance credits for carers.
Important note
Benefits can affect each other. Before applying for a new benefit or changing existing arrangements, you may wish to get advice from a benefits adviser, council service or carers organisation.